Gains and Losses
The traffic in Beijing was bad, and they had been delayed a while waiting for a car. By the time they returned to the villa, it was already nearing noon.
Gu Qinglan and Lu Mingxin got out of the car one after another. The former still wore a calm expression, while the latter inexplicably had a somewhat apprehensive look. Upon closer inspection, one could see that the bright lip gloss she had on before getting into the car was now completely wiped off.
Li Angyue wasn't one to pass up a good opportunity for gossip. He approached with a grin and said, "Ah, this is a prime example of details giving the game away." Despite his usually boisterous appearance, he truly lived up to his reputation as a renowned screenwriter, possessing such sharp eyes.
Lu Mingxin smiled even more awkwardly. "Teacher Li, you're joking."
Gu Qinglan neither explained nor concealed anything. He simply smiled at Li Angyue and walked into the house.
Leaving Lu Mingxin behind, feeling miserable: Why did she feel like a man caught cheating by the neighbors? And it had to be a middle-aged man too.
After the morning press conference, everyone was a bit tired. Fortunately, the chef had already prepared lunch, and they sat down to eat together.
It was a rare occasion for Gu Qinglan to dine with them. Lu Mingxin, ever the one to push her luck despite previous lessons, playfully teased him, "Mr. Gu, isn't your stomach usually too delicate to eat with us?"
To her pointless provocation, Gu Qinglan merely glanced at her. "I need to watch you."
Lu Mingxin, oblivious, naively fell into the trap. "Watch me for what? It's not like I'm going to run away."
Gu Qinglan smiled faintly. "To prevent you from eating things like scallions and garlic."
Poor Lu Mingxin had dug her own grave. It took her a moment to realize what he meant. She could only lower her head and diligently pick at her rice, pretending she didn't understand, that she didn't understand at all.
Unfortunately, Teacher Li Angyue didn't cooperate with her act and burst out laughing, slapping the table.
After all this fuss, Lu Mingxin felt embarrassed after lunch and went for a nap early. She slept until four in the afternoon.
Not long after she woke up, as if on cue, there was a knock on her door – three gentle, unhurried taps that sounded very much like someone's style.
Lu Mingxin answered the door to find a refreshed Gu Qinglan standing outside. He had changed out of the overly formal suit from the morning and was wearing linen clothes.
Most imitation antique linen clothes tended to look somewhat disheveled, but his did not. The tailoring was neat, yet the robe was wide and the sleeves large, exuding an air of effortless elegance, transcending the realm of the ordinary.
Lu Mingxin couldn't help but sigh internally; he truly suited a slightly more traditional style. With a little effort, he looked like an immortal banished to the mortal world.
Seeing her look him up and down, Gu Qinglan didn't say anything but smiled gently. "Awake?"
Lu Mingxin nodded repeatedly. Seeing her obedient appearance, his smile deepened. "Come with me to the study." Without waiting for her reaction, he leaned over and took her hand.
His hand was still slightly cool. When Lu Mingxin touched his palm, she suddenly thought that his body temperature was always low; his health was probably indeed not good.
She had originally only felt a little sympathy at this thought, but at this moment, she suddenly felt a pang of heartache. Perhaps it was because of how he looked in the car that morning, leaning against her shoulder with his eyes closed, looking truly exhausted.
The thought prompted her to speak, "Qinglan, you need to take care of your body too. We're still young; if our health fails, we have nothing."
Gu Qinglan had been leading her downstairs. Hearing this, his steps paused for a moment, and he turned back to look at her.
Lu Mingxin, afraid he would accuse her of reciting lines again, quickly assured him, "It’s not lines this time, really!"
A slight smile touched Gu Qinglan's lips. "I know."
After smiling at her, he turned and continued walking. Lu Mingxin followed behind him, looking at his broad yet somewhat slender back, and for some reason, felt another pang of heartache.
She had never thought that one day, just by looking at someone's back, she would involuntarily feel that the silhouette was too lonely, so lonely that it seemed he had already traversed thousands of miles, tens of thousands of years, just to stand before her at this moment.
Gu Qinglan's smiling voice came from ahead, "You didn't even ask, how did I know it wasn't a line?"
Lu Mingxin thought for a moment. "Because of my tone when I spoke? Is my acting so bad that even my lines are that obvious?"
Gu Qinglan couldn't help but chuckle. "Your acting isn't that bad..." He paused after saying this before adding, "I've watched all of your works."
Hearing this, Lu Mingxin was truly stunned for a moment. "All of my works?"
She didn't have too many works, but having debuted four years ago, it wasn't a small number either. In her early days, to build popularity, she had acted in quite a few idol dramas. How could those things, meant to appease teenage girls, possibly catch Gu Qinglan's eye?
Thinking this, she asked doubtfully, "You watched them to see my performance?"
Gu Qinglan neither denied nor confirmed it. Before she knew it, they had already reached the study on the first floor.
Gu Qinglan turned back to look at her, opened the door, and gestured for her to enter first. "Because I've seen all your publicly released works, I don't think your acting is as bad as the rumors say."
Closing the door, the study was a small world of ancient charm. Even someone like Lu Mingxin, who merely pretended to appreciate elegance, was very fond of Gu Qinglan's study.
Unlike many studies that advertised themselves as classical Chinese style and were cluttered with too many ostentatious decorations, this one was simple and elegant, with only a rosewood wood desk placed in the center.
On either side stood two rows of rosewood bookshelves reaching the ceiling, filled with a dazzling array of books. More than half of them were ancient books with visible thread-bound spines. If one wasn't paying attention, one might think they had stepped into an ancient library.
There was only one chair in the room. Gu Qinglan himself didn't sit but turned to look at her. "Mingxin, during the press conference today, you shared some insights about the script... I'd like to hear you elaborate."
Lu Mingxin knew he valued this script greatly. In the few days she had been here, she had also heard that the core framework of the script was actually provided by him. Li Angyue had been very interested after hearing it, which was why he had fleshed it out and written the current script.
To be honest, after learning this, her opinion of Gu Qinglan had changed somewhat. She had originally thought he was the type of person who was extremely aloof, disdainful of worldly affairs, and maintained a detached attitude towards everything.
But after reading the script several times and being deeply attracted by the story and characters within, she was amazed at how rich and wonderful the world in his mind was.
In this story, there was a monarch whose appeasement finally led to disaster, an ambitious and powerful minister, heroes who shed blood for their country, and scholars who took the fate of the world as their own responsibility.
Some details were polished and enriched by Li Angyue, and the brilliance of those parts went without saying. But just looking at the overall theme and framework, it was enough to reflect the profound historical knowledge and unique, wise perspective of the person who established them.
Lu Mingxin thought for a moment and answered more casually than at the press conference, speaking her more personal feelings: "I really like the character Lu Qingping. In that era where men were supreme, she still maintained her own thoughts and dared to pursue her dreams... Although the dream of protecting her home and country might seem a bit outdated and foolishly loyal now, even today, such a dream is still very noble and pure."
Gu Qinglan didn't interrupt, just watched her quietly, waiting for her to continue.
Looking at his gentle gaze, Lu Mingxin unconsciously relaxed further and revealed her more hidden thoughts: "Actually... I feel like it's very easy for me to get into character this time."
Gu Qinglan maintained the same posture and expression, but for a fleeting moment, Lu Mingxin thought she saw something brighten in the depths of his eyes.
He continued to speak very gently, "How is it easy to get into character?"
His voice was too gentle; Lu Mingxin couldn't bring herself not to answer, as if bewitched by him, she said, "When I'm reading the script, I occasionally feel like I've experienced those things once before. It's very easy for me to substitute myself into Lu Qingping, as if I am her, and she is me."
After saying this, she herself felt a little embarrassed and immediately added, "Maybe it's because I've read the script too many times, so I'm too immersed in the role."
Gu Qinglan still looked at her, a slight smile playing on his lips. "Perhaps... Do you have any other thoughts on this script?"
Lu Mingxin had wanted to say something for a while. Hearing him bring it up, she immediately continued, "Right, I haven't acted in a historical drama before. Although I really like the characters and the story, I haven't been able to immerse myself in that kind of atmosphere. Can you help me?"
Her asking Gu Qinglan for help was quite natural. Normally, for such matters, one would need to seek help from seniors or find a place to figure it out oneself. But since she was currently living with Gu Qinglan, and his mannerisms had an indescribable classical charm, she simply asked him.
Gu Qinglan just nodded. "That's easy enough. Some of the costumes are already made. I'll have some sent over tomorrow. You can start wearing them around the villa."
After he said this, Lu Mingxin was already stunned. Her original intention was to ask him how to make her temperament closer to classical, for example, "slowing down her speech," "reducing the fluctuations in her expressions," or reading more poetry, listening to more classical music, and immersing herself in classical culture.
She hadn't expected him to give such a simple and crude answer: wearing the costume in advance would help her get into character more? Lu Mingxin felt like she was about to be defeated by Professor Gu.
She thought for a moment and decided not to complain about him for the time being, but nodded. "Alright, that works too."
Gu Qinglan nodded with considerable satisfaction, looking her up and down. This was the first time Lu Mingxin had deciphered a feeling of "anticipation" from his expression.
So she thought, he must be looking forward to seeing her in costume in the future.
As if to practice the phrase "watch her and don't let her eat anything indiscriminately," Gu Qinglan also dined with them in the evening.
After dinner, Gu Qinglan smiled at her. "In a quarter of an hour, come for a walk with me."
Gu Qinglan's schedule was very old-fashioned. Every day after dinner, he would routinely walk in the back garden for an hour to digest his food, then return to his room for a bath, and be asleep before ten o'clock.
Because of his routine, the entire villa maintained this pace. Even if Li Angyue stayed up late sometimes, he would try to remain quiet so as not to disturb his rest.
After Lu Mingxin arrived, she didn't dare to challenge his authority. After all, he often had headaches. If she truly disturbed him that night and his headache caused problems, she couldn't bear the responsibility.
So usually at night, she would stay in her room watching movies on her tablet, or listening to music and reading novels, trying hard not to make any noise.
And Gu Qinglan's nightly walks had always been solitary; he had never invited anyone else.
Lu Mingxin felt she had received a lot of special treatment today and was rather overwhelmed by the favor. "Me?"
Gu Qinglan seemed to be in a good mood today and showed her a better face. "Who else but you?"
This condescending tone of bestowing a favor, Lu Mingxin grumbled inwardly: As if this was her honor. However, looking at Gu Qinglan's expression, he really did think that inviting her for a walk was her honor.
Ever since she started living with Gu Qinglan day and night, Lu Mingxin deeply felt the pressure of being an ordinary person. It wasn't that she couldn't pretend to be aloof and cold, but in front of Gu Qinglan, no matter how she pretended, she didn't seem aloof enough or cold enough.
In other words, Gu Qinglan's level of "coolness" was too high. Ordinary humans with average "coolness" couldn't even hope to catch up.
And so, the two of them went out for a stroll... no, a walk.
The villa Gu Qinglan lived in wasn't the kind built in rows by developers for sale, but a standalone, aged villa with no other buildings around it.
Exiting the surrounding wall through the back door, there was a long stone-paved path, flanked by mountain forests on both sides, said to lead to a nearby ancient temple.
In the outskirts of Beijing, dotted with ancient temples, Lu Mingxin had not yet had the chance to see that particular one.
The path could only accommodate two people walking side by side. Lu Mingxin walked beside Gu Qinglan. Afraid of mosquito bites, she wore long pants and would occasionally wave her hand to swat away small insects buzzing near her ears.
Gu Qinglan was much quieter, just walking with his hands down, strolling along the bluestone steps.
It was already dark when they came out. Along this path, there was only an infrequent, not-so-bright streetlamp. After walking for a while, Lu Mingxin couldn't help but mutter softly, "This is totally a haunted place, right? Will some strange things pop out?"
After she muttered a few sentences, Gu Qinglan finally couldn't help but chuckle softly. "Indeed, expecting you to be quiet was too much to ask."
Lu Mingxin snorted lightly. "I'm not like you, able to stay silent for half a day. I still have the desire for verbal expression."
Gu Qinglan replied faintly, "I thought not everything could be expressed in words. Better to save trouble where one can."
Perhaps this was his most arrogant trait. He had many things, thoughts in his heart, even love in his heart, that he often disdained to speak of.
Lu Mingxin felt a stir in her heart and asked, "Even if it means missing something precious and regretting it for life?"
Gu Qinglan paused slightly, his footsteps also halting for a moment. Lu Mingxin stopped with him, looking at his face, shrouded in the night and faint light.
Due to the limited light, she couldn't see his expression clearly, only that his skin appeared overly pale under the moonlight.
Time seemed to pass very slowly. He stood there for a long while before speaking softly, "I have never possessed it, so how can I speak of losing it?"
Lu Mingxin was stunned. She already felt heartache for Gu Qinglan; how could she be indifferent to his words?
She didn't know how to comfort him and instinctively tried to console him, "It's okay. What you didn't get from Miss Su, you might not necessarily fail to get from someone else."
Gu Qinglan just looked at her quietly for a while, offered no further explanation, turned, and continued walking forward.
Lu Mingxin quickened her pace for two steps to catch up with him. She was glib when complaining but clumsy when comforting others. After thinking for a long time, she still didn't know what to say. So, she simply reached out and tugged at Gu Qinglan's sleeve.
Gu Qinglan didn't pull away. She kept pinching the corner of his sleeve and didn't let go. It was a somewhat childish gesture, yet unexpectedly carried a hint of stubbornness.
They walked like this to the end of the forest path, where a temple stood silently under the night sky.
The rows of halls were built against the mountain, and at a glance, the black silhouettes seemed as if they could instantly transport a person away from this time and space.
The ancient temple was not a famous tourist attraction, and at this hour, it was even more deserted.
Except for a few flickering lights in the highest building, which looked like the monks' living quarters, the rest of the place was dark and gloomy. The small square in front of the temple was empty, without a single soul.
Gu Qinglan stood for a moment in the square in front of the temple and then said to Lu Mingxin, "Let's go back."
But Lu Mingxin tugged at his sleeve. "Qinglan, can you tell me, why me?"
These words had been swirling in her mind for a long time. Gu Qinglan's appearance had been too sudden, and his feelings for her seemed to have come from nowhere. Although she knew she was beautiful, she wasn't conceited enough to think that just a pretty face could make a man like Gu Qinglan fall in love with her.
Gu Qinglan stopped. He turned his head to look at her. "Mingxin, why do you ask that?"
Perhaps because they had confirmed their romantic relationship, Lu Mingxin now felt her heart beat faster whenever she looked at his face. She could only attribute it to Gu Qinglan's exceptionally good looks and her own poor self-control.
Thinking this, she did what she had wanted to do all evening. She leaned over and hugged him.
This was their first real hug. During the kiss in the car that afternoon, her mind had been in a complete mess, and she hadn't even realized they were embracing.
Unlike now, she could clearly smell the crisp scent emanating from his neck, and she could feel his body temperature. Although it was still slightly cool, when their body temperatures intertwined, it became a perfectly warm temperature.
She just hugged him like that, her voice softening, "I don't know either... I always feel like it's a bit unreal, as if you might suddenly leave again."
She waited for a long time before he responded. He raised his hand and patted her shoulder, his voice, as usual, gentle with a cool temperature. "I won't." Then he paused for a moment and said in a low voice, "Mingxin, do you believe in past lives?"
Lowering her head in thought for a moment, she then looked up and said, "I don't know if I should believe or not, but I believe there must be more hidden and profound connections between people."
As she spoke, she looked at him seriously. "It's like, I don't know why, but I always feel like we were once very familiar... not because we were together as children, there's something else, I can't figure out why."
She might have a carefree personality, but she wasn't stupid. After a pause, she said, "Qinglan, I always feel like you have a lot of things you want to tell me, but for some reason, you never have."
Gu Qinglan was also looking at her. His whole demeanor was faint, the so-called gentle and indifferent style of a gentleman.
Therefore, he rarely looked at anything with such a focused gaze. Now, however, his gaze was unexpectedly bright, so bright that even under the moonlight, it made her instinctively want to close her eyes.
He looked at her like that and spoke softly, "If I said that we knew each other in a past life, would you believe me?"
Lu Mingxin's breath caught. She couldn't tell if he was joking or being serious now. What should she do in this situation? She thought for a long time before tentatively asking, "Then, did I love you very much in my past life?"
He smiled faintly. "No, you didn't love me."
Lu Mingxin thought to herself, "I'm doomed," and tremblingly continued to ask, "Then was it you who loved me unrequitedly?"
He actually nodded slightly and chuckled. "You could say that."
The journey that Gu Qinglan usually completed in an hour took them more than an hour and a half due to their stopping and starting.
When they returned to the villa, Li Angyue had already gone to his room to rest, leaving only an empty living room.
Although she had let go of his body later, Lu Mingxin had kept hold of his sleeve, and she still hadn't let go when they reached the villa.
It wasn't until they went upstairs one after the other and stood at Lu Mingxin's own door that Gu Qinglan turned back to look at her with some helplessness. "Mingxin, are you asking me to go back to your room with you?"
Lu Mingxin shook her head. She always did as she pleased. She didn't feel like she was seducing Gu Qinglan by doing this. She just didn't want to let go of him. It was as if, if she let go, he would disappear to some unknown distant place.
Actually, Gu Qinglan had always given people this feeling. From the first time she saw him a few days ago, she felt that if a gentle breeze came at any moment, the person before her would disappear with the wind, or soar upwards, never to be seen again, and she wouldn't be surprised in the slightest.
But before, she didn't care where this person went. They were childhood playmates, but he had also gone abroad and disappeared for over a decade, so it shouldn't be impossible for him to disappear again.
Seeing the dazed look in her eyes, he smiled, wanting to say something, but before he could speak, he coughed lightly a few times and leaned his hand against the nearby wall.
Lu Mingxin quickly looked up at his face, only then noticing a thin layer of sweat on his forehead, and even his lips were beginning to turn faintly pale.
So scared that her limbs felt a little stiff, Lu Mingxin hurriedly rushed over to hug his body, asking urgently, "Qinglan? What's wrong with you? Is your head hurting again?"
Gu Qinglan coughed lightly a few more times, his breathing also somewhat rapid. The hand hanging by his side finally couldn't help but press against his chest.
The way he looked definitely didn't resemble the symptoms of a tension headache. Lu Mingxin was already panicking and called out again, "Qinglan!" then leaned in, wanting to kiss his cheek.
But he slightly turned his head away. Under the light of the corridor, Lu Mingxin saw him close his eyes lightly, and then his body, like a suddenly collapsing mountain peak, fell silently towards her.
Lu Mingxin leaned against the wall behind her to barely catch the person falling onto her. Her mind went blank for about one or two seconds before she realized what had happened.
Subconsciously, she hugged Gu Qinglan's body tightly. She thought for a moment, understanding that she should call for help, but when she opened her mouth, she found her throat hoarse, unable to make a loud sound.
In her panic, she scanned her surroundings and saw a flower stand nearby with a plain porcelain vase holding bamboo. Without much thought, she reached out and forcefully knocked the vase over.
She used almost all her strength in this action. The vase was sent flying, hit the opposite wall, and then shattered with a "peng." The sound was loud enough that anyone in the villa should have been able to hear it.
Lu Mingxin breathed a slight sigh of relief, finally having a moment to fumble and cup the face of the person in her arms, checking his condition.
She didn't know if it was because of the lighting, but she felt that in those brief few tens of seconds, his complexion seemed to have rapidly turned ashen. Now, looking at him, she felt his lips were tinged with a pale blue.
Although she had encountered various fainting and even death scenes in dramas, those were all fake, and she knew it in her heart.
When she truly encountered it in reality, she was still at a loss. She felt scared and didn't dare to move him casually, just letting him lean on her shoulder like this, tentatively calling him, "Qinglan? Qinglan?"
He still didn't respond. She couldn't help but press her cheek against his, then she tilted her head and kissed his cheek. She didn't know if it was because he was unconscious, but his cheek had become somewhat cold. Lu Mingxin, while holding him, began to let her imagination run wild: he looked like Sleeping Beauty. If she kissed his lips, could she wake him up?
She seemed to have been sitting there stunned for a long time, or perhaps only for a moment. In a daze, she heard Housekeeper Zhou's voice. He seemed to be calling her name. She looked up and saw several faces hovering above her.
There was Housekeeper Zhou, Li Angyue, and other servants. It seemed the sound of her smashing the vase was indeed very loud, attracting everyone in the house.
She looked up at them and only managed to utter two words: "Qinglan..."
Housekeeper Zhou's voice was still calm. "Miss Lu, it's alright. The Master just fainted. We'll help him to his room."
Lu Mingxin looked at him blankly. She really wanted to believe his words, that the person in her arms had only temporarily fainted and would wake up soon. But she still hugged him tightly, as if trying to transfer some of her body heat to him.
Finally, even Housekeeper Zhou seemed a little unable to bear her appearance. He turned his face away and sighed, saying to the servant beside him, "Quickly help the Master to his room to lie down. Isn’t the floor so cold that it will make the Master catch a chill?"
The two servants were also well-trained. They quickly and politely asked Li Angyue to step aside a little, then came over to help Lu Mingxin up.
She kept holding the person in her arms tightly and refused to let go. The two servants simply half-pushed, half-carried them, first moving them into Lu Mingxin's room.
Even after the person in her arms was placed on her bed, Lu Mingxin still clutched his arm tightly, holding his arm in her embrace, kneeling by the bedside.
The door was quickly closed, shutting Li Angyue outside. Housekeeper Zhou then asked the two servants to leave as well. He lowered his voice and sighed again, "Miss Lu, whether you believe it or not, the Master has really only fainted temporarily. He will wake up soon."
Lu Mingxin looked up at him. She felt her face itching, and when she casually wiped it with her hand, it came away wet. Sobbing, she said, "Qinglan-gege..."
When Gu Qinglan had his eyes closed, he could hear Lu Mingxin's calls. She called him "Qinglan-gege," as if she were right beside him, yet also as if her voice came from a very distant place, accompanied by the faint creaking and bumping of a horse-drawn carriage.
In a daze, he remembered they should be on the road from the capital to Liangzhou. It was the time when winter was ending and spring was arriving, but the northern frontier was still bitterly cold. Dust from outside, mixed with ice shards, seeped into the carriage, diluting the meager warmth inside.
This should be the last time he lay in her arms. She was very worried about his illness then, holding him throughout the journey, constantly calling him: "Qinglan-gege."
He suppressed a cough, forced his eyes open, smiled faintly at her, and raised his hand to touch her eyebrows, which were as beautiful as distant, ink-washed mountains. "A'Xin..."
He called her "A'Xin," her pet name, which few people knew besides her parents and close relatives.
She quickly grasped his somewhat cold hand and pressed her cheek against his palm, the warmth from her soft cheek transferring to his hand.
There were tears in her eyes, and she said with a choke in her voice, "You're already so ill, and Her Majesty still sends you to guard the border... What if something happens?"
He couldn't help but cough and chuckle lightly. "A'Xin, I was the one who petitioned to guard the border."
She was still very dissatisfied, pouting as she said, "Why? It's not like you lack military achievements."
He wanted to say it was all because she talked about the battles on the northern frontier every day, looking like she was eager to go into battle herself. That was why he ignored the empress's advice and insisted on submitting the petition.
He didn’t have the means to give her a military position, but only by doing this could she go to the battlefield as a female family member accompanying the army.
Thinking this, he smiled faintly and changed the subject, "Besides, I've only caught a cold. It's not a serious illness."
She still frowned, looking at his pale face with great worry. "Your constitution has always been poor. If I caught a cold, I'd be up and about in a few days, but look at you..."
As she spoke, she lowered her head and touched her forehead to his, then complained again, "Look, you still have a low fever!"
He could only smile at her reassuringly once more. "It's nothing..."
This time, he had only said two words when the cough he had been suppressing for a long time erupted uncontrollably. She held him tightly, hearing that dull yet almost heart-wrenching cough, her voice becoming even more choked. "Qinglan-gege, you..."
His coughing subsided slightly, but with the next cough, he unexpectedly coughed up a few specks of bright red blood, which splattered on the bedding to the side, like a few red plum blossoms scattered in the snow, strikingly vivid.
"Qinglan-gege..." she called him again, her voice already laced with tears.
He tried hard to comfort her. When his vision cleared again, the ancient road and the thin horse were gone. Before him was the ceiling of his own bedroom, and Lu Mingxin clutching his arm.
He sensed her panic and a faint smile touched his lips. "Mingxin?"
This time, Lu Mingxin scrambled to sit up and looked at him. His face was still deathly pale, but the color had returned to his lips somewhat, no longer so lifeless. His eyes were also open and fixed on her face.
Lu Mingxin hurriedly reached out to touch his face. In doing so, her body pressed against him again, making him cough repeatedly.
In the midst of the chaos, she cupped his face with both hands, leaned over, and kissed him on the lips before breaking into a tearful smile. "You're really awake."
Gu Qinglan had definitely never experienced a moment more chaotic than this in his entire life. His clothes and hair were disheveled by her, and his face was covered in her tears, and perhaps even snot...
His head had been aching for a while, but he had finally regained some strength. He couldn't help but frown and raised his hand to wipe the smudged makeup on her face. "Wearing makeup at home... wash it off... even crying looks so tacky..."
When Lu Mingxin obediently went to wash her face and remove her makeup, then obediently returned to kneel by the bed, Gu Qinglan was already much better. His face was no longer so pale, and he was leaning against the headboard, drinking the ginseng tea that Housekeeper Zhou had someone send over.
Stealing a glance at him, Lu Mingxin silently sat at the foot of the bed, curling up to try and minimize her presence.
She had just washed her face, and all her makeup was gone. There was still a small drop of water beside her cheek, giving her a kind of beauty different from usual, a pureness that was unforgettable.
Looking at her, Gu Qinglan's lips curved slightly, and a soft sigh escaped: her beauty was just too eye-catching. In their previous life, if it hadn't been for her appearance, perhaps they wouldn't have gone through so many twists and turns...
Just recalling a little about their past life made him frown again, and he turned his head to cough lightly.
Lu Mingxin was now extremely focused on him. Hearing him cough, she immediately moved closer, staring at his face with concern. "Is your head hurting again? Are you okay?"
Gu Qinglan smiled at her and shook his head lightly.
Lu Mingxin was still worried. "I asked Housekeeper Zhou just now. He said you started having intermittent headaches and fainting spells last year. When you faint, your breathing and heartbeat become extremely slow... It looks like you're already..."
She still didn't dare to say that word, took a light breath, and then continued, "Housekeeper Zhou said you were still abroad then. When you were sent to the hospital for emergency treatment, the doctors were about to give up... only then did you wake up. Later, you fainted a few more times, but not as severely as that time; you usually woke up after a few minutes."
Seeing how genuinely worried she was, Gu Qinglan smiled at her reassuringly. "Yes, sorry for scaring you. It's just a neurological issue, it's nothing serious."
Lu Mingxin lowered her head and sniffled. She looked so pitiful that Gu Qinglan, feeling helpless, placed the teacup on the bedside table and raised his arm towards her. "Come here."
As if she had received an imperial edict, Lu Mingxin didn't hesitate for half a minute before throwing herself into his embrace.
She hugged his body, feeling his body temperature, which was lower than a normal person's but still warm. She half-buried her head in his chest and said somewhat aggrievedly, "You scared me to death."
Logically speaking, she probably shouldn't have had such a strong reaction.
Even if Gu Qinglan was her childhood playmate and current fiancé, they had only reunited a few days ago, and their engagement was only a matter of days.
Some couples who had been together for months or even years didn't react as intensely as she did when one of them suddenly passed away.
At that moment, she was truly in despair. She had previously read novels where, in describing the protagonist's grief at losing a loved one, the phrase "the whole world died" was used.
That was exactly how she felt at that moment. Nothing could better represent her feelings at that time. She truly felt that the world had died. If he was gone, then nothing else mattered.
That kind of despair was so profound, as if engraved in her soul, making her entire chest ache.
She leaned against his embrace, her eyes reddening again. She simply rubbed her face against the fabric of his chest. It was fine linen, soft to the touch, and very absorbent.
Gu Qinglan also sensed her intention. He felt a bit helpless, but seeing her so sad, he could only gently pat her shoulder to comfort her, "Be good, don't be afraid."
Lu Mingxin sobbed in his arms for a while longer. She suddenly remembered something, quickly straightened up, and looked at him seriously, "Qinglan, was it because I kept mentioning Miss Su that you were in a bad mood and fainted?"
Gu Qinglan smiled at her faintly. "Why would you think that?"
She felt even more remorseful, on the verge of tears again. "It's all my fault for always bringing up Miss Su, that's why you keep getting headaches, right?"
Gu Qinglan didn't expect her to say anything profound, but her constant misinterpretations made him feel he had to enlighten her a little.
Raising his hand to hold Lu Mingxin's, he looked into her eyes and said in a low voice, "Mingxin, I no longer care about the failed relationship from before. All my abnormalities are not because of Xiao Ji... I hope you can understand."
Miss Su's given name was "Su Ji." He actually called her "Xiao Ji," which sounded even a little more intimate than how he called her "Mingxin."
Lu Mingxin muttered to herself inwardly, completely unaware that this emotion was called "jealousy."
She threw herself into his arms, snuggled a few times, and settled in contentedly. She hugged his arm even tighter, making no secret of her feelings. "Qinglan, I think I'm already a little in love with you."
Gu Qinglan's breath hitched slightly, then he spoke softly as if nothing had happened, "So quickly?"
Lu Mingxin nodded in his embrace. "Yes, so quickly... But anyway, I've known you for over twenty years, so it's not exactly a whirlwind romance. I probably won't lose feelings quickly either..."
Gu Qinglan chuckled lightly. "I don't want to be fallen in love with like lightning, and then abandoned."
Lu Mingxin thought of what he had said before, something about "falling in love with her to forget her," and quickly asked, "What about you? If I fall in love with you, will you abandon me?"
As she said this, her peach-blossom eyes were wide and round, staring at him without blinking, very much like some kind of small animal.
Gu Qinglan's lips curved slightly. "All I seek in this life, is only you1."
After Lu Mingxin heard this, she paused for a moment, then said thoughtfully, "Is it only by confessing our feelings in four-character phrases that it sounds sufficiently artistic?"
Gu Qinglan casually tapped her forehead, shook his head, and said another four-character idiom: "A cow chewing peonies2."
𓇼 ⋆.˚ 𓆉 𓆝 𓆡⋆.˚ 𓇼
When it was time to sleep at night, Gu Qinglan had also rested well and was preparing to go back to his own room. Lu Mingxin, however, lazed on the bed, hugging his waist and not letting him move.
Gu Qinglan could only raise an eyebrow at her. "Unmarried and sleeping in the same room, aren't you afraid of what others will say?"
Lu Mingxin snorted lightly. "What era is this? Let them talk if they want."
Gu Qinglan looked at her with a smile. "Oh? So you trust me then."
Lu Mingxin chuckled, looking him up and down. "Between the two of us, shouldn't you be the one worried about your personal safety?"
Seeing her truly becoming arrogant due to his favor, Gu Qinglan smiled and reached out to pinch her nose. "Thinking of rebelling, are you..."
Before he could finish his sentence, Lu Mingxin reached her hand inside his shirt, groped his chest firmly a couple of times, then turned around, smiled, and ran.
After fooling around like this for a while, Gu Qinglan really did sleep in Lu Mingxin's room that night. The bed was big enough for them to sleep separately, but by the latter half of the night, Lu Mingxin had already rolled over to Gu Qinglan's side.
When she woke up the next morning, half of her body was nestled in his arms, and there was a suspicious wet patch on Gu Qinglan's pajama chest.
If this scene were witnessed by outsiders, Lu Mingxin's "goddess" title might be in jeopardy. After all, not every "goddess" drools in her sleep and curls up on someone's chest like a kitten.
But in front of Gu Qinglan, Lu Mingxin was much more at ease. After waking up, she simply sat up, yawned sleepily, glanced at the drool stain she had left, and then said happily, "Oh my, look, there's a cloud on your chest."
Gu Qinglan's pajamas were pure white cotton. The area where the drool had spread looked like an added cloud. Seeing her shameless smile, Gu Qinglan instantly gained a new understanding of the lower limits of her integrity.
Gu Qinglan got out of bed before her. After a while, he walked out of the dressing room, having changed out of his pajamas and into a dark three-piece suit that exuded an extremely ascetic aura. He curved his lips slightly and said to her, "Up?"
Lu Mingxin wiped the drool marks from the corner of her mouth and said coquettishly, "Qinglan-gege, why did you get up without calling me? I wanted to see your sleeping face."
Having witnessed her various eccentric states, Gu Qinglan could now barely tolerate her speaking in such an affected tone.
However, he still looked her up and down for a while, his brow furrowing slightly, before saying, "I have something to do today."
Lu Mingxin tilted her head and thought for a moment. It seemed he had a class this afternoon, and she hadn't heard him mention any plans for the morning. Why would he "have something to do"?
She thought for a moment, and for some reason, suddenly had an epiphany. A mischievous smile immediately appeared on her face. "Oh, oh, I get it... a man's reaction, huh..."
After she finished speaking, she originally expected Gu Qinglan to coldly reprimand her or scornfully curse her. Unexpectedly, he only furrowed his brow even tighter and, after a moment, said, "Watching the fire from across the river, be careful not to get caught in it yourself3."
After saying this, he maintained a very cold and ascetic posture, turned, and went out.
Lu Mingxin lay on the bed thinking for a while, then started pounding the bed and laughing out loud: What to do if I suddenly find this ascetic type even more fun to tease?
✿——✦——✿
1. 毕生所求，唯卿而已 (Bìshēng suǒ qiú, wéi qīng éryǐ) ⤣
2. 牛嚼牡丹 (Niú jiáo mǔ dān) - meaning a waste of good things on someone who doesn't appreciate them / casting pearls before swine / unappreciative of something worthwhile. Gu Qinglan is basically teasing her for not appreciating the beauty and depth of such expressions when Lu Mingxin teased him earlier for using poetic expressions (All I seek in this life, is only you). ⤣
3. He’s talking in a poetic way again to warn her, 隔岸观火，小心殃及自身 (Gé àn guānhuǒ, xiǎoxīn yāng jí zìshēn). ⤣
